Today as I walked in the sunlight with one of my littles
it suddenly hit me that I felt like "me" and I haven't felt like "me"
for a long, long time.
I know who I am at my core,
a daughter of Christ, a wife,
beloved by both my God and my husband.
But everything else has been fairly shiftable.
I have struggled at my work,
wondering if its me or my employers/clients, or both.
I have been brought to points of needing to make decisions
that decidedly alters my/our life for a season,
and that is hard.
Some roles I thought were mine for asking have been taken away.
Some roles I have never wanted I have been asked to take.
Things I have deeply desire have been witheld.
Many close to me have been hurt and are currently hurting
physically and/or emotionally.
This is not a pity nor an empathy party.
Just an admittance.