Our lives have been this quiet, almost melancholy flow of late. Not really sad, please don't misunderstand, but an almost joyful, quiet, melancholy. Which I am so very hesitant to write about and share. I'm not quite sure how to share.
I much prefer to just be quiet and retreat to the quiet understanding of my home.
The winter months are hard for me and for us.
I somehow feel winter come in and feel it deeply. The cold winds seem to come into my very being
and I'm never quite warmed through until the sun shines warmly again.
The gray seems to settle as a fog into my mind causing all thoughts to be slow and muddled.
Somehow the slush covering the ground makes me conscious of my sluggish limbs and invites insecurity to reign over my sense of self. The violent gusts of winds accurately reflect my emotions as
they shift and change without my permission or understanding.
There are so many things about the season of winter that I enjoy and I
~Eucalyptus and Lavender and for how it makes our apartment smell when sprinkled on our heater.
~Warm leggings and remembrances of fun times with April.
~Secret birthday plans and the giddy feeling I get knowing I'm the one who gets to makes birthday plans for my man. I am so very happy and honored to be his wife.
~For rest. Because 1/2 of my nanny littles are sick with colds and I'm giving my body a day of rest to fight the cold I can feel coming.
~For this time just the two of us. The Burkhardt's. I am so grateful for this sweet time of just us, and although it is not what I planned or even hoped for it has been and is beautiful, and I am so grateful for it.
I have been in almost daily pain for several years now,
varying from a dull aching to mind numbing pain depending on the day.
We were sharing a little bit of this with some friends of ours who in response
asked if we had ever considered it being a reaction to dairy,
because you know dairy can cause inflammation right?
And inflammation from dairy could present itself like arthritis right?
Um, yeah no, never EVER considered that.
And yet through a series of experiments and an elimination diet we have
found out that I am indeed allergic to something in dairy products.
So January has been full of changes in diet, lots of studying, lots of headaches from said diet changes and general Januaryness, lots of frozen mornings, wondering if our toes will be ever be warm again, lots of working and cute slobbering babies.
cutest thing ever right?
And he LOVES to give hugs and kisses (:
27 lbs of pure cuteness and slobber. I love my job.
So long January,
we're grateful for the lessons and laughs you brought.